Movies Logo
January 31, 2010

Season 1

01. Moving Out

I get a new place. Ash looks totes fugly - ugh - I mean tired in this one. Wardrobe provided by Donna Karen.

1min
January 31, 2010

02. Moving Day

My bodyguard is responsible for everything related to my body, including moving the stuff I surround my body with.

1min
January 31, 2010

03. Bodyguard

Got legit sick filming this. Didn’t sleep for 48 hrs. Not cuz of drugs, you haters, b/c I’m an effing method actor.

2min
January 31, 2010

04. Baby

I consider getting a baby. At least I think that’s what happens. It’s been a while since I read the script.

2min
January 31, 2010

05. Baby Daddy

Bodyguard flat out refuses to be my daddy baby, so I flat out threaten to steal his sperm.

2min
February 8, 2010

06. Depressed

I’m tired of waiting around for that special someone to have a baby for me.

2min
March 1, 2010

07. Hangover

I learn never to drive drunk. Especially when driving a blimp.

2min
March 1, 2010

08. Fight

I know to get emotional when the piano music kicks in.

2min
March 1, 2010

09. Philip Seymour Hoffman

I get acting lessons from the Academy Award-winning creep-o.

2min
March 13, 2010

10. Cat

I decide to get a cat rather than have a baby because it’s more expensive.

1min
April 4, 2010

11. Back to School

I’m going back to college to get my The Bachelor degree.

2min
April 4, 2010

12. Extension

Can I have an extension on that paper I have to write? I have to learn how to write.

1min
April 11, 2010

13. Paper

I ended up getting an “F” for “F”-ort.

1min
April 11, 2010

14. Crush

It’s just a little crush and I throw up a little every time they touch.

1min
April 18, 2010

15. Ashleyguard

But Ashley doesn’t have nipple hair!

2min
April 18, 2010

16. Nightmare

Quiet, Evil Dragon, I’m trying to write a description!

2min
April 26, 2010

17. Zac Efron

A date with Zac Efron? Zac Ef yes!

2min
April 29, 2010

18. Philip Seymour Hoffman 2

Is this about all those blimps I crashed? Because I keep telling you guys, I don’t care.

2min
May 3, 2010

19. Gun

Do you feel lucky, Bodyguard? Are you a Luckyguard?

2min
May 3, 2010